April Showers...

I have a love-hate relationship with rain. As an allergy sufferer, I am happy to see rain (until the mold spores start a poppin' up). Yellow swirling pools of pollen mean that I won't be breathing that toxic stuff in. And rain in April is a said to bring May flowers. Two reasons to like spring rain.


Rain nourishes. Rain cleans. Rain floods. Rain creates mud my dogs track in. Rain is a necessary part of the continuance of life.

Do you like rain? How about rain in your life? In your marriage? Your relationship(s). Think metaphorically here for a minute, Reader. Is rain a necessary part of social being? (I don't mean Facebook or Twitter!) If you are alive, if you have ever been part of a group, a team, a workplace, a relationship, a FAMILY - you've had rain.

And sometimes storms. You know them. You've weathered them.

Do they bring May flowers?

Rain - arguments, disagreements, flat out Fights. As newlyweds or engaged couples, you and your beloved will have rain. In my youthful 20s, 30s, and even 40s, I thought, "This is it. This is the big one." Not understanding that rain is part of a relationship. It doesn't mean a flood. It doesn't mean a hurricane is brewing. If it's raining, a tornado doesn't land.

Rain is passion. Rain is fervent belief or selfish ambition. Yes, rain is pride. Rain is self. Rain is also hurt. Denial. Fear. Perhaps all wrapped into one storm cloud. You see?

Rain is not the determiner of whether your relationship fails or succeeds. Wear foul weather gear. Wear a rain hat and carry an umbrella and let the sting of rain fall off you like beads of water on a freshly waxed car. Don't carry a rain meter and measure out how much has fallen. Shake it off. Get a towel and dry off. TOGETHER. Apologize when you caused the storm cloud to break. Apologizing is a great pride breaker and it calms the storm. Humbles it.

In my middle age, professionally declared by my cardiologist,  I can do this now. I can dry off, shake it off, stow it all away. The trick, Reader. is not to bring the same storm on again. Ah, how do I do that BouquetLady? You decide. You determine. You just, as Nike says, do it.

April showers bring May flowers.

Rain withstood early in your relationship brings stability later. It nourishes. It grows you. Each of us can be a jerk. Me. YOU. Not just your partner. Personalize your jerkiness and recognize it and try to keep it at in a closet somewhere, high on a shelf. Let those flowers grow with the nourishing rain and fertilizing power of forgivenss and apology.

Bring on the rain.